I remember the pain. I remember the aching. I remember the fear. I had just broken up with a guy I thought I was going to marry. I hurt so badly and it wouldn’t stop. I had had break-ups before, bad ones. But this was worse. This was unbearable. Would I ever be loved? Would I always be alone? Is this kind of love the best I could hope for? Was it what I deserved? The list of questions and thoughts and fears was on a loop that played over and over and over.
Lies. Questions. Doubts. All based on my insecurities, my weaknesses, my guilt, my shame, my past. So distant from Truth. All swirling relentlessly in my mind. I couldn’t turn it off. I couldn’t think about anything else. And that was another lie.
What would stop that loop from replaying? 2 Corinthians 10: 5 tells us that we have the mind of Christ and we have control over what we think. I can’t stop a thought from coming into my mind but I can decide if it takes a seat and stays awhile or not. Did you know that you have that power?
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
The first time I really put this into practice I had just gotten some bad news. God had led me to get out of debt and I finally made it. I didn’t have a lot of margin but I was debt free. And it felt wonderfully free! And then my car broke down. The cost was about $750. At the time it might as well have been a million because I didn’t have that either.
I could feel anxiety rise up in me. With it came an onslaught of fear-filled thoughts and doubts. They started racing around in my mind. And then I said “NO! Lord, I can’t do this. YOU wanted me to get out of debt! Was it just so I could get more debt? I can’t do this! You’re going to have to fix it. I don’t know how You’re going to do it but I can’t so You have to.“ I was resolute and I moved on with my busy weekend.
The anxiety and thoughts started to come back several times over the next couple of days and every time I responded the same way – I started talking to my Father with pretty much the same script. I had complete confidence that He could. I just didn’t know if He would.
Sunday morning, getting ready for church, the anxiety started bubbling up again. And again, I turned to God and told Him I needed His help, His solution to the car repairs and my finances.
I was on staff at my church but I didn’t always go to my office on Sundays. That particular Sunday I had to grab something and on the way to my office I passed the staff mailboxes. I could see something in mine so I checked it out. Y’ALL! It was an encouragement note from a couple in the church…AND A CHECK! And just like that God answered my prayers from the weekend.
He is good! He does love you! And if you will hold your thoughts captive to Christ and turn to Him in those circumstances, He will encourage you and meet your needs.
Young woman,
As God’s child, you have the Spirit and He will lead you into all truth (John 16:13). You also have the power to hold every thought captive to Christ. If you find that the recording playing in your mind is hurtful, kick it out. If it is good and true, let it linger. Have a hard time telling the difference? Think about this – Jesus loves you and He is kind and gentle to you. Think about how he treated women He encountered while He was here. He treats you with the same tenderness. Are the words on repeat in your mind words that He would say to you? No? Kick them out and start talking to Him immediately. Cry out to Him.
If you test this out, or if you have your own story of God helping you stop the awful recordings we play over and over, I’d love to hear about!