pure silver

I grew up in the Seventies. Big floppy hats and peasant dresses. Hip-huggers and bell-bottoms. Everything fringe and silver. It was cool. Truly cool. That’s when my love for silver began.

Silver is special. It has to be cared for and treated appropriately. As long as you do that it will remain beautiful. But if you neglect it…or if you leave it exposed to the elements…it will lose its beauty quickly. When silver is cared for, when it’s protected, it enhances the beauty that already exists.

Our purity is like silver. As long as we protect it from the elements it remains beautiful and it enhances our beauty. We protect our purity by looking away from things or people who don’t belong to us, by kicking out those thoughts and images that want to lazily linger in our minds as if it doesn’t hurt anyone, by refusing to let our hearts desire what isn’t ours, and by keeping our flesh from being fulfilled by another.

Remember how I told you that my friend, Alisha, told me to read the Bible starting with the New Testament? I did that. I started in Matthew and by the time I was in 1 Corinthians I was dating Danny. I was really trying to focus on God and Danny was focused on me. Danny was a good kisser but that’s all I wanted. Danny wanted more, much more. I didn’t have the words to explain to him why I didn’t want things to go further. I just felt it was wrong. Then I got to this section in 1 Corinthians that said:

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20
– the whole chapter is really perspective-changing.

There it was! I had my reason and it made perfect sense to my mind, my heart and my soul. You know who it didn’t make sense to? That’s right. When I saw Danny that night, I was so excited to read it to him. When I did, he just looked at me and then acted like he hadn’t heard anything. Maybe he hadn’t. After that, what Danny and I had felt empty. It was like I had such a strong connection to the Truth that it severed any connection I had with Danny. It was sad. I was sad. I wanted him to “get it” but he wasn’t interested. And then I wasn’t interested in him.

I didn’t always protect my purity. I have gone through seasons when I felt really alone. When I sought intimacy in someone other than Christ. I didn’t always flee as early as I should. I looked at and let my eyes linger on images that we would call pornographic…and those images don’t go away. They’re still there. I’ve let my mind dwell on fantasy or romance or lust and I’ve let my heart desire things and people that God didn’t intend for me. And I let myself be “fulfilled” by the world. And all of that left me with two things:

First, they left me emotionally beaten up – abused, scarred, and broken. Second, they pulled me further away from the God who created me, the Savior who redeemed me and the Holy Spirit who is fellowship with God in me.

About 10 years ago, I met someone different from all the others. He never asked anything of me. He protected my reputation and my honor. Our friendship over a 5- or 6-year period turned to dating and turned to marrying my best friend. All the things I had heard were true. Jumping into intimacy leads to mistrust in a relationship but waiting and purity allow for deeper intimacy and complete trust.

Young woman,

our world, culture, Netflix, music, even some of our friends want to take and destroy and tarnish our purity. But it is so worth protecting. You are worth protecting and caring for. You are welcome to contact me and ask me anything. I’ve taken the path of purity, self-respect, self-cherish and I’ve taken the path of abuse, brokenness, shame and guilt, and fear. One path gave me life. One path left me beaten up and broken emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, and relationally. I want the path of purity for you. So flee! Make your eyes flee images of any kind that you know you shouldn’t see. Make your mind flee thoughts and fantasies and even seemingly innocent romance that stirs desire in you.

Set your heart up to desire God above all else so that it won’t desire what He hasn’t planned for you. Make your body flee false intimacy or intimacy that just too early or outside of His best for you.

In order to be innocent, you cannot be naïve.

Treat yourself as precious as silver.