Hi Young Woman! Are you ready? It’s so exciting! The Holidays are upon us! They can be SO FUN! They can also be really hard. I know because for all of the Thanksgivings, Christmases and New Year’s in my 20’s, 30’s and 40’s I was single. For that reason, I want to remind you of a few important things:
You are enough. Be confident in who you are in Christ and in the circumstances and season of life He has you in. Yes, He’s aware of your marital status. He has all of the details of your life in mind and all His plans are for your good. Yes, really!
Your time is valuable. You might have a little more flexibility but that doesn’t mean you’re less busy than you’re married friends and family. Make sure you’re getting enough rest (that one is always hard for me!), taking care of yourself, and guarding the margin in your schedule. It is okay for you to say no. It’s okay for you to set and stick to boundaries. Please, schedule in time alone with the Father and, for my sake, please schedule in some fun!
There is nothing wrong with you. You’re not too much. You’re not too strong. You’re not too independent or too confident. You are not single because of something you lack and you’re not single because you’re too much. You are single because God has good plans for you and this is part of them. For some reason, it’s common to think that we need to be more something and THEN we’ll get married. You know, your married friends didn’t receive some special enlightenment that has somehow eluded you. They were messy before they got married and they are just as messy after they married.
Loneliness is normal during the holidays. Just remember two things. First, you are not really alone. Jesus really is with you. Second, I have found that the best way to respond to loneliness is to get your eyes off of yourself and on to others. Who can you bless? Who in your life is lonelier than you? Loneliness exists whether you are married or not. Learn to be content in all seasons and in all circumstances. It’s normal to feel lonely, just don’t let it consume you.
One last thing. Be prepared for THE question. “When are you going to get married?” Why do they ask that? It’s not like you know. But if you get through the 2019 holidays without being asked THE question at least once, please let me know. It’ll be a small miracle! So, how will you respond? I’d really love to know. I hope you have assurance in God and His plans and His timing to be able to say this with confidence: “I’m not really focused on that right now. I have great friends and a full life. I love where God has me and I trust Him to bring what I need when I need it.”
Oh how I hope that’s true of you! And I genuinely hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving!